Election Day 2008: From Bad to Worse

It’s Election Day, and I’m in a bit of a funk. Terrible choices abound, with nothing positive in sight. I can see a few outcomes from today’s elections (very generally), and none are terribly great in the short- and near-term. However, being as optimistic as I can, where I can:

1. Obama is elected in a landslide, and the Democrats win firm control of both the House and Senate. To my mind, from a long-term perspective, this might be the only potentially positive scenario. If it happens, then the resulting destruction can only be pinned on the Democrats. Because they’ve railed against and promised to decimate the free market and capitalism, they’ll only have their failed philosophies to fall back on. Americans blame the Democrats for the devastation, and pro-capitalist Republicans–informed by the recent increase in interest in Ayn Rand and Objectivism–rise from the ashes to reclaim American government for the Founders.

The potential catch: the mainstream media, who put Obama into office, retains their ability to obfuscate and deceive, and their power over the flow of information for the majority of Americans. The media, in cahoots with Leftist academics and intellectuals, convinces the American public, somehow, that it’s still capitalism to blame for their misfortunes. In this case, all bets are off, and we should get ready to start wearing red stars on our chests.

2. Obama is elected in a squeaker, the Democrats control the House, but the Republicans can still filibuster in the Senate. This would result in most, but not all, of the Left’s agenda passing without contest. The destruction will still occur, but the Democrats retain the ability to blame the Republicans as obstructionists. The American public believes the story that things would be dandy if only those damn Republicans wouldn’t get in Obama’s way. Palin loses to Obama in a landslide in 2012, and the Democrats attain iron-fisted control over Congress. Scenario #1 is thus played out, only after an additional four years of pain.

An alternative here is if Obama’s corruption is revealed and his presidency is a shambles or he’s literally impeached. Biden takes office and the U.S. becomes an international laughingstock for four years, with Biden and his cronies in Congress stripping the U.S. of our military prowess and convincing the Islamic world to unite against a weakened West. Palin is elected in 2012 and ushers in a new Dark Age of religious control ending in a nuclear exchange between the Christian U.S. and a united Islamic nation. Palin’s fellow Pentacostalists wait patiently in bunkers for the arrival of the Antichrist.

3. McCain wins in a landslide, while the Democrats maintain control of the House but don’t expand control of the Senate. In spite of its fundamental (and laughable) unlikelihood, this is probably the worst scenario. The economy will continue to be destroyed by government intervention, which McCain will do nothing to forestall. Capitalism will continue to be blamed, and the Republican party as it exists today will continue to have no good response. Clinton wins in 2012, and Congress retains partial control over Congress. The U.S. declines in stature and is overtaken by a rejuvenated Chinese communism and newly minted Russian fascism, ushering in a new Dark Ages of violence, turmoil, and the destruction of the free-thinking human mind. Ayn Rand’s remains self-combust in a fit of disgust from beyond the grave.

3b. McCain wins in a squeaker, the Democrats either gain complete or partial control of Congress (doesn’t matter), and the Left succeeds in convincing the public that Obama’s loss was due to widespread voter fraud. Riots break out* throughout largely black neighborhoods, and the U.S. is sent spiraling into a race war as the media assumes–and declares–that all black people should be violently offended that the election was stolen from the One. Martial law is declared, and the press is suspended for inciting riots and violence against the United States. Iran, emboldened by a distracted America, hands a nuclear weapon over to Hezbollah, who lights it off in Tel Aviv. Israel responds by turning Iran into a parking lot, but not before a series of dirty bombs are ignited in cities across the U.S. The country spends the next 10 years trying to recover, only to turn into an isolationist, paranoid, emasculated version of its former self. Pat Buchanan becomes President eventually, until Canada, the U.S., and Mexico merge into the United States of North America. 

*Note that this blog does not support the notion that black people will necessarily riot should Obama lose–race is a collectivist myth, and every human being has the power to control his own thoughts, beliefs, and actions. However, the media has already made clear its belief in this possibility, and so in deference to their infinite wisdom, it is being introduced here.

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